Is there a Priest in the House?

The 11th season of Idol is in the books… What have we learned and what have we taken away from this season? The Finale show last night was superb, as they have been the past several seasons. If you don’t choose to watch the show weekly, you should catch the finale anyway.

Once again, the big hitters showed up to perform (mostly) live and again, we have some amazing duets and lots of surprises.

As I defiantly stated, I was not interested in the showdown between Scoddy and Laurena. My understanding is that there were six country songs and Lauren actually had the better night. However, that would have just added to my disdain for the voting process as Scoddy has won every week by a landslide for several weeks (according to DialIdol.com). This week was no exception. So the results of the show last night were a foregone conclusion for me and I just wanted to enjoy the show for the other performances. And not just the performers, but the juggheads as well… We got to hear RJAXX rinse and repeat the phrase “in it to win it!” about six thousand times. Perhaps next year, we get a Randy doll to sit in, the kind with the pull string on the back, and have it say “in it to win it” and “it was pitchy”. The show could save some money that way. JLOW’s bit was cheesy, and Tyler’s bit was hilarious. The addition of LIPS and JLOW was great for the show.

On to the performances, and I’m not sure these are in order or not, so bare with it!

Group performance by everyone: I haven’t seen this much cheese since I visited that Wisconsin deli. All the posturing, posing, crotch-grabbing and other unsavory shenanigans was one big fondue pot of molten limburger. C+

And then Durbin gets to perform with one of my favorite bands of all time, Judas Priest! I had wondered out loud on several occasions before the show if the Priest would show up, and here they are! Total kick@ss performance and show by the British metal band. Keep in mind, these guys are 62 yrs old. Take that ya jackanapes! A+

Then Jakub Lush comes out with his flubbercheeks, and I didn’t hesitate for one second to fast-forward through the whole thing. I have earned the right to fast-forward anything that this goofstick sings, as I had to critique the horrid sounds that were emanating from his vocal septic tank all season long. F-

Grizzly Abrams and Jack Black: This was vocally, AWFUL. This duet was funny and very entertaining, but if you were to grade singing, it would get a D- … However, it was a neat diversion from the pressure of competition and I was still on a natural high from the freedom and relief of fast forwarding past Jakub Lush. B-

Girls doing a medley of stuff… It was fine, not sure if it was live or not—they all sounded too good. I’m a bit suspicious. To be honest, I forgot most of the girl’s names, but then again, I am not good with actual names. Most of the girls got eliminated too early so there ya go. B

Oh yah, and Beyonce came out with the ladies and showed them how do it right. A

Haley and Tony Bennett: Haley rocked and didn’t get enough exposure last night. She should have been in the final. Her duet with Tony was spot-on and all the other times she was highlighted, she showed everyone that she belonged in that finale. I’m hangin’ this on the producers and it should be a scream for help to install a new voting system…. A

Scoddy and McGraw: It was decent, well sung, nice chemistry. It smelled of leather and Marlboros. It had a brokeback mountain vibe to it. Nicely done… B

Marc Anthony with dirty dancing by JLOW… The singing was meh…. And in Espanol… Sheila E is in the house—she must be about 60 yrs old, but can still beat the skins. JLOW and her famous uhhh Dairy Air were proudly on display and made me wonder what their home life is like… B+

Guys with Tom Jones: What’s new pussycat? Having Durbin sing that made me laugh. Seeing Tom Jones made me chuckle a little as well. The ladies got Beyonce, who is current, and the guys get Tom Jones who they had to break out of a museum to show up. Tom Jones is so old, when he went to school, there was no such thing as a History class. C+

Lady GAGA: We finally get the live performance that we thought we were going to get a couple weeks ago. She is hugely talented and weird at the same time. Her wardrobe choices are beyond the boundaries of earth. However, the lady can sing, and play a piano like no one’s business. I respect that and I admire her for never having to use the godforsaken auto-tune! Thank YOU!! The song was cool, the production was slick, but my only criticism was that guy who was molesting her on the fake mountain. I wish he would have fell into a vat of molten cheese. A for Gaga… F for that chucklehead at the end.

Laurena and Carrie Spraytan Underwood: Nice sassy performance by both, although Carrie looked like she’s been fasting for two weeks—c’mon eat something, Underwood! Lauren held her own and will go on to be successful in the hee-haw world. A-

Beyonce Part Deux: Hmmmm, how does one guest singer get two different spots on the show? As much as I respect Beyonce, I have to say that this song caused emotional distress and excruciating discomfort. I had to take qtips to get all the sap out of my ears after that aural contamination. D+





U2 with Spiderman: by this time, it is obvious that everything is a promotion for something else. Oh wait, I figured that out in the first minute. It was decent with the funky acrobatics and whatnot. The song was well done. Does that Edge guy ever NOT wear a hat? I wonder if he has an exposed brain, perhaps born without a skull? The spider-kiss with JLOW at the end was an epic FAIL. B+

Steven Tyler (Lips): The old goat still has the chops and who knew he could play the piano? At age 87, he can still screech like Phyllis Diller on nitrates. Super good, fantastic… it was *****ing great! A

So now it’s time to announce the winner. So far, great concert for an hour and 45 minutes, and finally the results. Of course, we all know it’s Scoddy the Botty! Sure enough, to no one’s shock and haw, McCreery wins it hands down. Scotty, you Alfred E Newman lookin’ hillbilly!


Congratulations country boy!

It was a promising season, with great talent and cohesive judges. For the most part, it was fair and impartial, until the end when Durbin and Haley went home prematurely. In addition, Jakub overstayed his welcome by about six weeks. Voting limitations will be the only way this gets fixed.

So thanks everyone for your comments and feedback. I truly enjoy the banter. What do YOU think of Season 11???


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