Thursday, May 10, 2012

Silly Sing & Swing

Last evening's two hour extravaganza marathon Idol event was pretty entertaining and certainly had its share of stupendous performances. However, these two hour monsters are becoming more about the show, rather than the singing.

Let's cut some fat, shall we... Thankfully, the Tommy Hillswinger experiment disappeared into the night with nary a whisper. His impact was certainly realized by Phil Phillips, with a big goose egg. So that segment is gonzo... How about we cut the Coke guy out - you know, the dude with the bling-bling neck brace... Do we need that distraction? Personally, I could care less, and will fast forward his azz off my TV during the finale. Although I like the "behind the scenes" bits, we have had them several weeks in a row, it seems. It has reached a level of superfluous-ness and will render future shows less impactful. Unrelated filler like the Rock of Ages piece should be played on Thursday nights, not Wednesdays. That just turned out to be a huge marketing gimmick for the movie, simple as that. It is my opinion that they ran a rehearsal and still came up with extra time, and therefore threw in the GROUP song with all four singers. Save it for Thursday nights. Bring the show back to an hour, please. And thank you for your time.

Now onto the show... The themes were 1. Random? and 2. "Songs I wish Judas Priest would perform on the show." Oops, wrong crowd... I meant, "Songs they wish they would have written."

Bring it on!

Philip Squared or P2 - Have You Ever Seen the Rain: Phil defies the laws of pitch. It don't matter what he sings, it's like he's immune to pitch issues because he's just so damn unique. In any event, the unkempt and unshaven Phil chose wisely and performed brilliantly. A- Volcano: One of Phil's best performances to date, definitely the right kind of song to showcase his quirky, indie sensibilities. He's BAAAACK! A

Holly Cabinboy - Faithfully: Hot steak Hollie continues on the path of redemption by doing this Journey remake. And she has some mighty Swiss miss marshmallow balls to be taking on a song that the DAWG performed a zillion times. Nearly flawless and good for her for making this a competition. A I Can't Make You Love Me - Oh Hollie, wrong song for you, girl! You were pretending to feel this, but you are too inexperienced to connect... Although it wasn't as bad as the judges said it was, it was not up to par with everyone else's 2nd efforts. B

Josh The Messiah Leadhead - You Raise Me Up: Meh... Nothing to see or hear folks. Same old, same old. Boring song, typical Josh performance. Not to say it's awful, but it is mundane and routine. Of course, the judges ate it up, and Josh just stands there smiling that smug smile. B- It’s a Man’s, Man’s, Man’s World: Better than his first performance, this song at least had a pulse higher than that of a zombie. Did it deserve a standing O? Of course not, but did you expect anything less? Same answer. A-

Jessica Saladshooter - Let's Steal Away: What was up with all the suitcases on stage? Is this a singing competition or the train station to Hogwarts? This was just ok for me. Not her best, but not utter crap like last week's Proud Mary. She's got the growl down for sure. B+ And I’m Tellin’ You: As Jimmy the Hat mentioned, you back Jessica in a corner and she fights back like a pissed off honey badger. This was, for me, her best performance to date. I am not a big fan of Jessica, but she hit this one out of the park, and onto Waveland Ave. (that’s for you, Cub fan). Range, tone, pitch, dramatic ending... All near perfect. A

Duet 1 - Philly/Joshy - This Love: 100 times better than last week's sack of sadness, You've Killed That Loving Feeling. Best duet ever, Steven? No, but it probably seemed like it, comparatively speaking. Phil stood out over Josh, hands down. A

Duet 2 - Hollie/Jessie - Eternal Flame: How about internal bleeding. Nice swing set on stage. This was goofy and awkward from the get go. Only when the two doofuses came out and played on the swing, did it get entertaining. Boys get an A, Girls C+

Quartet Combo - Waiting for a Girl/Guy Like You: Gratuitous time killer. At this point in the show, I am ready to drink paint. Please stop the madness of trying to cram in all this filler garbage. Group numbers, as I had mentioned, are for Thursday frickin' night. That said, the only part of the song that was interesting was when they cross harmonized on the chorus. Otherwise, blahhhh... B

Ryan Seakrust - Julianne Hough interchange: Just stop it. Please. F

So here are the rankings for the night--very close:

Phil
Jessica
Hollie
Josh

Good to see 'ol grayshirt back on top. May his good fortune continue for three more weeks. Had Hollie picked a better second song, she would be giving Phil a run. Jessica put herself back in contention with a solid night. Josh, it would seem, is cooler than Obama, the Pope and Brad Pitt combined. He is good, but not near as good as the three Kool-Aid drinking judges make him out to be.

I see both Josh and Hollie in the bottom two. Will we have a shocker outing with Josh going home, or has Hollie finally relinquished her ninth life? Goodbye Swiss Miss--you made me a fan, which all but guarantees you will be voted out, and for that, I'm sorry.


OUT

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